You realize if you die tommorow, the last memory i'll ever have of you is your ballsack on skype
tonight's goal was "most regrettable decision" and you bring wine coolers?
my parents are out trying to convince the local liquor stores to post "do not sell our daughter alcohol" flyers. i'm preping my defense now.
dude, seriously he just sucked the milk out of the dogs breast and swallowed it... for $20, wtf....?
we've been doin it since '07. it's like married sex now, were both comfortable so neither of us really tries anymore, we just do it because it's convenient
I got used. This is the happiest day of my life. I was just a huge cock and that is all she needed.
Having a man strip on demand was an awesome way to start birthday. What more could a girl ask for? U the best!
Idk dude but he said something bout his "dick was gonna be so tan" then he jus jumped out of the car
Our conversation concluded a weekly schedule of casual sex in between classes.
It just smells like spaghetti and despair.
I tried to light my cup as a bong. I'm done drinking
Like not to be gross, he was eating me out while I was smoking a bowl. It was like a rap video
I just kept hitting the drum to get thru the crowd to the bar. Surprisingly it worked
We probably shouldn't have humped each other in a stairwell for an hour. that was probably my bad
And when were you going to tell me to stop dancing on his coffee table singing "come on irene?"
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