Why did I call the Oregon Department of Transportation at 4:30 in the morning, and who did I talk to for three minutes?
you can't get genital warts from dogs can you?
i dont think duct tape can fix my g spot
lets call myth busters
She washed her feet in the sink at white castle. I want this girl in my life.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Theres a fat guy wearing a speedo. Someone just got puked on, and didnt even react. Whats happening?
If I don't have herpes this will be the single greatest day of my life
I would call you but I don't feel like these hands belong to me.
Also what is the name of Americas thing where we had a holy obligation to expand westward? I'm going name my new lighter that.
Ive only just recently decided that NOT fucking you would be best for both of us.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
so today, i decided to say "fuck it" to mental stability, take a klonopin and wear a blanket toga. New Girl is on Netflix, nothing could go wrong.
A gay guy went down on me in the club bathroom and then fixed my makeup for me
its gonna be a great night
My booty call is in the theater watching Deadpool right now. Never though comics would work against me.
I danced shirtless on a platform with a fucking stripper who went to MIT
I'll seduce him with my charm, after all, I am a graceful swan.
More like a demented cow.
A total of 3 guys left my apartment this morning. That was my first clue to my black out endeavors last night. Gotta love wine Wednesdays.
Randomize