if this week's events in iraq have taught me anything, it's that when pulling out, always expect a mess...
Just woke up on a couch in the FIJI house with 2 missed calls from someone I saved in my phone as "Some DU Kid Named TJ Maybe"
you make me proud to be your friend
Omg. The strippers are having a batman vs spiderman showdown. Both on stage. Genius.
We had literally Just finished having sex when he handed me a plan B and said he lied about wearing a condom.
His appology was" look at it this way, at least you'll give better head without those teeth.'
Not till Sunday. I'm going to sleep in my car. And I know. This place is insane. Blood on the stAirs 5 dollar slices of pizza. A girl on our floor had a stroke.
I met her tumbling down the stairs chugging Captain Morgan. I'm not sure why she has the better reputation either.
She gave us all a pep talk at the bus stop at 1 AM. It involved cupcakes and somehow ended with her making out with her best friend. God bless college.
it's like my freshman wet dream come true
My sugar daddy is a bigger asshole than i am. What's wrong here?
All I've done is masturbate and drink while being home from college.
I'm too over dressed and drunk for this emergency vets office
I didn't want him to hear me sneaking in. The doggie door was the perfect solution.
When I woke up this morning I swear my mouth tasted like dick and rolaids.
I hit an all time low we ran out of coke and I met up with my dealer at 8 in the morning for a re-up. great customer service though.
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