where are you?
in the room with the baby pig
k im coming soon
I would kick you in the vagina but I'm afraid I would lose my shoe.
i just shit an entire soup salad and breadsticks from the olive garden... bud light wins again.
I couldnt decide if i wanted to pee first or vomit. So i Peed sideways while throwing up into the tub.
We'll cross that bridge when we come to it... Or burn it. Either way we'll deal with it later
Oh god. Standing was a rash decision
I made it to Starbucks to do work and I've just been sitting here with my head on the table for 30 minutes...
I saw a guy do a line this morning in line to start the 5k, happy thanksgiving!
My dream of watching a live dick sword fight might never be realized now. Currently sobbing, shots to follow
I wanna get high and watch Shrek tonight...don't make me do it alone.
It's amazing what a couple of orgasms can do for a girls demeanor.
He's being awfully beer snobby for a guy who ordered salad
Hey babe! Random question. Do you by chance have the pic of my nipples covered with ninja turtles band aids? Thanks.
Would it be totally wrong, that in honor of princess leias death, I role played as her??
Btw, apparently no one knows who ordered the pizzas for the after party, no one paid, and the delivery lady made a celeb shot, took a beer, then said she'd be back later to finish up the game...
I wore my lizzie mcguire socks to the bar last night. Because that's how i get all the ladiez
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