Question. If Kwik Trip and Kum and Go were to merge, what would they call it? Kwik Kum or Kum Kwik?
We were playing flip cup on the nice dining room table. Losing team had to shamwow the table in between rounds
2 showers later and I'm still finding cum on random body parts of mine
Blowjobs in the shower are a lot like blowjobs not in the shower. Awesome.
I just found out that the liquid capacity of my breasts is 700ml each. I should not be left alone at home when drunk.
BIGGER SANDWIJH COME NIW OR DIE
Something strange is happening to me, I think I miss hooking up with girls sober
Hey so I just want to get straight to the point it was me who ate the last cupcake and it was your sister who I fucked last nigt
Ohh man. That was a snatch-waxer with a score to settle.
Please tell me those naked pics were not your mom. Lie if you have to.
I wanna snuggle with you as we feed each other chipotle burrito bowls and that's just where I'm at right now
I made him cum so hard he couldn't play video games for like an hour. I've never been more proud of myself.
Look, you're talking to the wrong girl here. Tacos>dick always and forever
god i just can't wait for finals to end so i can just masturbate all day and night
I just sent a Slack that autocorrected tomorrow to gonorrhoea. Please note that Slack autocorrect isn’t very good.
Randomize
