NO FUCKING WAY. PLEASE MAKE HER IMPLANT THAT POOR KID INTO A RESPONSIBLE UTERUS.
can't believe I ate straight coffee grounds to stay awake for that
I passed out and woke up with my pockets full of Lucky Charms cereal and chocolate coins. Another successful St Pattys Day.
i'm using my hot pot to make jello shots in a muffin tin. i'm never ever graduating.
mom just found 19 empty wine bottles in my closet. i hate spring cleaning
I woke up because I was nodding to the dream question of "would you like a sombrero?"
she just gave me a present from you... on a stripper pole. in front of the whole club. :)
WHY ISNT THIS A PICTURE MESSAGE
I want to hold her baby but I'm afraid I'll give it a contact buzz
Dude I reek of $2.50 pitchers, $1 off/pack marlboro cigs, and fear.
Fear?
FEAR.
currently wearing a football players overly sized underwear. discovered a shot count on my leg. I'm a tank hahahhh
They usually take it with their boobs. It's like a horizontal motorboat
Han Solo would be ashamed of me.
So I have to masturbate in a hospital. I wonder what kind of porn they have.
I love everything about him! His penis, his hair, his tattoos, his penis, his cat, his penis.
how do you know everyone's mad at you?
I just woke up feeling shameful
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