i literally would have sex with every single person on this girls wall, but not her
You stuck your head out the window to puke and got hit with a mailbox.
okay, I promise to stop paying strippers to hit you
I fucked her and then she made me sleep on the floor next to her bed because she 'has a committment problem'
How many layers of skin can you loose before it becomes bad?
This is stressing me out. I feel like I need to eat the dick.
well he got me up crazy early but i got pizza for breakfast and an electric blanket to sleep with sooo he passed the one night stand test.
I seriously doubt I'm gonna be able to properly put your dick in my mouth whilst upside down, but I'm willing to give it my best shot
doing squats while I brush my teeth.. gotta keep the booty in check
We poured all the Fireball on the Slip and Slide and long story short I have two black eyes.
The number of threesomes I have agreed to seems to increase every time I talk to you drunk...
I can't believe I watched you put a tampon in in the parking garage
In California. Through an entire game + OT. That’s a long time to have an octopus in your pants.
My boss walked into my office and gave me a toothbrush and tips for dealing with sex hair. She knows what’s up
Our son just found our secret Sex Dungeon that is no longer hidden in our basement. He brought his Xbox and the TV down there he is currently sitting in the sex swing playing video games. What do I do?
Randomize
