i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
so i made out with some dude last night at the bar. and some girl just stood there and watched. i felt bad so i made out with her too. She looked like she felt left out.
I totally need to blow more fat guys. His cum tasted like vanilla ice cream
She's a virgin AND a minister's daughter. We're one schoolgirl outfit from the dear penthouse trifecta
Maybe I should forgo underwear.
This is a family BBQ no?
you kept looking at stripers and saying " Go to College"
Do you remember Kelly my alter personality? She talked like a man and would sing amazing grace?
I'M SO WET FOR FREEDOM
Do you think the firemen will remember me?
Yes. But you were sloppy, sobbing, and puked on two of them. You won't get in their pants.
In unrelated news guys should not ask what I'm doing/wearing if they can't handle an honest answer. I'm not pretending I'm not sitting on the couch in yoga pants watching Community so you can beat off.
I'm rolling and just noticed that the thread count on these sheets is horrendous.
We had a quickie at work in the office. He walked out before me, and I fell asleep while waiting a few minutes to walk out. Yeah. He's got that change your life dick
Fun fact. I just wrapped myself in wrapping paper for a sext. Is this a new high or a new low stay tuned.
Hammered...8am...why is there chickens in the living room?
Always great to be boarding a plane when you realize that what you thought was gas is actually very untrustworthy
Randomize