A joint and a Nerds Rope = breakfast of champions for the unemployed
wow, i just saw a girl period all over the floor. get my shoes
ur penis kinda felt like a vagina to me
im celebrating the fact lent is over and i can give blow jobs again.
Its people like u that make people like me go to rehab. He has a lazy eye for christ sakes.
I've had to much cheese to give a fuck about anything. im tired.
We didn't want to make a pit stop so I just helped my husband pee in a bottle. No one told me this was part of love.
Boise Idaho, where you have a one night stand with someone from your town 3 states away and run into them the day you return...
He literally said I should watch game of thrones while I was blowing him like is this the conversation you want to be having right now
eh, I feel I'm heading for a breakdown and I need to get it out of the way before I start writing that lab report.
I see the guy who's been trying to get me to let him eat my ass became engaged on Facebook today; would framed screen shots be an appropriate wedding present?
YOU SHOULD HAVE BEEN THE FIRST VISITOR TO CHRISTMASLAND
he just asked me that if he was a penguin and I was a penguin if I would fuck him
I'm like a great zombie Jesus.
Keep your fingers crossed. If I get to go to a Stanley Cup game I'll give you the blowjob he deserves for taking me. Because hes definitely not gettin it.
Randomize