I just made a milkshake without a blender... thats determination
remember the good old days of high school when a half gal would last for more than a nite
i just licked my manager on accident and i'm freaking out
The pine trees are waving at me.
Put the pipe down honey.
Hi trees.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I apologize for getting really drunk, taking off my shirt, bitching someone out, crying, and breaking something at your party next weekend...
After he was done he gave me a case of landshark and tickets to tomorrows yankee game. This is the best nonrelationship ever
Come to me. Jacob is confessing his love and all I want is a hot dog. With chili. Not love.
You almost make it sound as if getting an education to further your career is more important than beer and tacos.
Kristy just reminded me that I have a bottle of champagne to lick off your ass hole...... This is by way of saying that we have plans on Friday.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ok there's 63 pics of you jerking it on my camera from New Years. The time stamps say it took you 40 min to get there too. See a doc, your only 22.
Found a phone out last night at the bar. EPIC homemade porn vids on it!
Stop watching porn on my work computer.
STOP WORKING ON MY PORN COMPUTER.
I don't have time to shower before my passport photos...your cum is all over my hair...that's with me for 10 years now
I wouldn't know what to do. You never really mentally prepare for a cactus getting thrown at your face.
Last night was just a whirlwind of Mario Brothers and sex.
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