I have a story that starts with Nutella and ends with sex in the laundry building at RIT.
Boobs. All I remember is boobs.
I just pulled the condom that i lost on tues out of me at work ewwww!
you know that hot chick that stutters? talk about an awkward orgasm
I just smelled my beer. It smells like coming home.
He just yelled in the bar, "So I stuck it in two girls butts, why are you bringing that up now?"
whoooo knowwsss what george of the jungle juice is but i feel like im in the promised land
What's great about college is that i can eat chocolate cereal for every meal and call it a money saving technique.
He's going to find out eventually, but really what's he going to do? Cry about it and buy another fucking kitten??
I plan on blacking out and milking a cow
I feel like a sex bomb and I need to go explode on somebody
Found her grinding on my boss with her tongue down her throat last night. Guess who just got promoted!
I wish I may, I wish I might, get some daddy dick tonight
Is there a number of dicks a girl can have in a weekend before it becomes unacceptable? Asking for a friend
Remember! It’sa long weekend and a holiday weekend and it’s America’s birthday! So don’t short change me!
I thought you were asking for a friend
I don't wanna SLEEP with him, I want to start bar fights with him. There's a difference.
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