Ps what kind of horrible ppl are we that we both checked blackberries during sex and neither minded?
Are you seriously drinking already? It's 11AM. Still morning.
I'm going by McDonald's time. And since they stop serving breakfast at 10:30 and start serving lunch, it is now afternoon.
i think i pulled off the nice guy thing too well. it just backfired later on when she thought i was actually nice.
Still can't believe they give people like us a drivers license and college degree.
I was going through my paperwork and I found the lifetime warranty card for my 14" dildo. I saved it. You know, just in case.
We decided to play beer pong where the loser had to beer bong a pitcher of beer...people just started losing on purpose. It was a bad idea.
The worst part was I wasn't conscious enough to move out of the way, I knew i was being puked on but I couldn't move.
This gem of a conversation has been brought to you be weed
I picked up a chick last night on crutches wearing a I am boobman tshirt. I love raves.
Don't know why you're always hating on relationships. I've had chocolate pancakes accompanied by a blowjob and a blunt and it's not even 9 am. Time for mid morning shower sex. Enjoy your morning bong bowl alone asshole
I'm not really sure if I peed the bed last night or if the cat was trying to get back at me for using her litter box last weekend
I'm more worried that you thought licking a pole on Bourbon street would turn me on
Beer. Pizza. Seething Rage. I will be full of two of these things tonight. You get to decide which two.
I figure I since I made out with him that I at least had to save his number in my phone.
It's like Guy Diamond blew glitter into my vagina.
Randomize
