"The real world" DC house is on the corner of 20th and S. Wanna come with to check it out? It's my goal to be a blurred out face in their hot tub.
His sex texting was like a step by step guide to the most boring sex ever...
I didn't think her British accent was real until I saw how fucked up her teeth were.
i keep looking at my boobs and it just baffles me how he could give this up.
He told him to "throw up in my mouth like I'm a baby bird."
Well besides you comparing him to your dead cat, I'd say it was fine.
the potatoes in the margarita machine wasn't the breaking point. its when he turned on the stove and put a bunch of bottle rockets on it that i knew the night had prematurely failed
I can't believe he let me cut his hair as stoned as I was.. I think I even cut my own hair too
but im not going to tell the owner of the penis of my dreams how to wear his hair.
She called to say her plane was running late and i had 30minutes to get to the airport for bathroom sex
She deliberately backed into the homewrecker's whoremobile and yelled ""FOR SPARTA!"
Note to self:A blacklight toga party at a frat house is a bad idea. Some things cannot be unseen
I mean, if you want to light yourself on fire for maximum accuracy, far be it from me to stop you
All I remember was you telling him there was something behind him so he would turn around and you could slide down his carpeted stairs on your belly without a shirt on. How's that carpet burn btw?
We should get drunk in walmart
when?
20 minutes ago
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