all thats left of you is your magnum wrapper on my dresser
I just punched cris angel in the balls. I have photos.
Jus posted an album so big that it takes my manhood into question
He gets you donuts, dinner, and booze consistently, who cares if he's cheating
21 Ladies Confess The Grossest Things They Do When No One’s Around
get over here now. the boys are doing shots of everclear, chasing with monster, and some dude jsut walked in with a backpack full of tattoo gear.
It's also dangerous to ride a bike down the stairs after a few beers, but I've done it.
On an unrelated side note: I shall now attempt to crawl to the bathroom. Where I will lay motionless on the cold ceramic bathtub with hot water pouring over my shivering body as I desperately try not to vomit. Good day.
That's like.....u just dangled a sex carrot in front of me then took it away!
THE MAINTENANCE MEN WERE DOWN STAIRS AND I THOUGHT THEY WERE MY MOM. I'VE BEEN YELLING 'GRILL ME A CHEESE' AT THEM FOR HALF AN HOUR
23 Tweets I Thought Were Really Funny When I Was Drunk Yesterday
I'm adopting to save the world from the moral outrage that would be my offspring
I can not be a lesbian living on Beaverland.
That was the second worst thing to happen to my asshole.
I just wanna have sex and go to Denny's after is that too much to ask for.
He forehead kissed me AND THEN asked what I was thinking. I'm taking away his man card.
Watch out for the bush at the end of your steps. it comes out of nowhere