in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
I didn't exactley write on my bucket list -- "hook up with a townie at a drivers intervention program"
well, 500 bucks doesn't grown on trees, and i need that bear suit for any chance of vagina access.
If I had a quarter for every time I had sex in your bed while you were out of town, I would probably be a lot more willing to buy you new sheets. Hope you're having a nice vacation.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My overnight senior got drunk and hooked up with Kaylee on Sunday. I checked Facebook and he already put down his deposit for next year. This school should pay me a commission.
U owe me five dollars for that paper towel you bet i wouldnt eat last night
it's 10:36pm. Do you know where your penis should be?
Sober me is really good at getting to the airport on time. Drunk me is really good at shitting my pants. Do you know how much pants cost at the airport????
I'm still drunk. it's summer. I just need a hot dog and an aspirin.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You invited the cop in for a "Celebrity shot"
You got called a pussy at a party with a slow cooker, you can't let that shit slide
No apologies necessary. Just give me sex and Pop Tarts, and we'll call it even.
Its almost 1 am and u wanna get together and cry naked
I'm actually really happy I can say that my first body shot was out of a gay strippers massively ripped chest
She threw her burger out the car window last night. My vegan neighbors were not pleased but I’m pretty sure I saw a for sale sign go up on their lawn so I owe her one.
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