I don't even want to talk about it, I'm traumatized. Even the dog knew to take advantage of the most intoxicated girl at the party...
yeah, its right past the deli mart where i showed my right tit for mozzarella sticks.
I'm love that we're talking about a possible 3rd 3some, and that you're going to be a dad.
If it's any consolation, your boobs looked awesome.
we should hire that guy that makes pancakes that we met last weekend for our next party. He can feed us, and regulate!
His penis smells like laundry I just wanted to cuddle it
It's not that I'm in love with her, so much as I would love to be her lesbian experience.
Whatever it's Canadian jail, it's not like Guatemala or something. It'll be nice and cushy and they'll probably throw him a big bday party with all his friends and strippers
Guess I was throwing darts at a patrons head last night, lol! Black out
Nothing bonds a father and daughter like washing her puke off the front steps
I almost don't wanna have sex with her because I'm afraid she'll steal my hat
his mom called during sex and he made me talk to her I think we're getting serious
Ugh I don't want to adult today. I need like a dozen more coffees. Or cookies. They're interchangeable.
Update: pile o Coke party starting at approx 4 - 7 and going until 1ish to celebrate our founding fathers and love of cocaine and hatred of everyone\n
I think it’s appropriate to celebrate the start of mother’s day at the bar with the men that almost made me a mother
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