This fat girl in front of me just got on the bus to go 2 blocks. Do you think she ever wonders why shes fat?
He's a fan of Alicia Keys on Facebook. It doesn't NEED to say 'interested in men'.
on my arm i have a score card from when we apparently had a competition to see who could harden his nipples fastest..
who won?
THAT is your concern right now?
I say that when we get our grades back we're making a drinking game out of it.
I dig being used for consequence free sex. Not consequenceful sex.
I feel like now would be a good time to apologize for vomiting in your eye
Had to awkwardly dig through all my fake ID's to get my real one so I could vote.......Model citizen over here.
Let's enter the circle of trust. Are we there yet? Ok. If I somehow hypothetically slept with Amandas ex husband...on a scale of one to ten...how bad is that?
I feel like somebody ate me, then shit me into my bed.
I guess she fell asleep at the strip club and the other one was crying because she had a vagina in her face. Happy 21st!
I had 17 beers 2 days ago. I'm not dad material yet
It's Christmas, you should know what a virgin is.
They had to take me to the ER because I got a concussion in a parking garage. Not partying with lesbians for a while
shut up and let me use my vagina as a weapon of self destruction in peace!
I love you with the passion of a thousand FUCKBOYS during the height of week 1 texting
Randomize
