that's when I learned why R Kelly peed on that bitch
Great date with Damon, but I'm not sure if telling him I like lesbian porn is a good second date discussion.
So I just walked into the bathroom, and there was this kid, talking to his mom, while taking a shit. I flushed the toilet next to him and heard him say into the phone, "No, I'm not. I'm in my dorm."
you were on ground yelling about how close the floor was to your face.
obviously he has no clue about college dating. it goes drunken sex then the 1st date
Something smells like weed and I think it might be my mascara. Come sniff my eyes
GET THE DICK OUT OF YOUR MOUTH AND CHECK FACEBOOK.
get over here soon, theyre throwing bbeers at us from the roof. keyword : throwing
Should I tell him the real reason I was in the hospital, or should I just keep him thinking the side effect he thought was in for was allergy related, not I just miscarried the child I didn't know we were having?
Would "deck the halls with penises " be an appropriate event title? I know peni is the plural but flow of the tongue as well
While he was gone for spring break I took his head board... I don't wanna wake up from his shenanigans for the rest of my college career.
You rolled onto your side and told me 'this is the recovery position'. That was after you were stoned. You've done this way too much.
I have a tattoo that says Yolo. You should not have been asking my advice in the first place
So my POF profile is full of Archer references. Only guys who get them will be getting any response to their messages.
I put on a face mask and masturbated for an hour... my face now has a green tint
Randomize
