i just got a UPS package from a name and address i dont know, with one of my thongs in it. no recollection.
how the hell did u puke all over the magazines... do u still want me to keep them
Somehow ended up at a stranger's bridal shower. Everyone else is already drunk.
Hindsight is 20/20. Or a bladder infection.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This may be hard to believe, but that wasn't the first time I was fingered under a snuggie
It's not
All of a sudden i love everyone. In all their flawed and failing beauty. This is pretty good weed.
In the pictures there's a flower in my hair and also a lobster, I need those things explained
This isn't just a hangover. I can feel the blood moving through my veins, and it hurts.
When he opened the car door the whole thing fell off. Even that can be forgiven via his monster cock.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've sent two unsolicited tit pictures in less than 24 hours. I'm the female version of a fuckboy.
You use your abs way more than I realized. Btw multiple orgasms is the best thing I've ever discovered.
Hey, I was just wondering why i dont have a shirt on, why im cuddling with a furnace, why im in my own basement, and where my car is.
You kept saying “keke” over and over so I slapped you then you proceeded to ask if I loved you. In case you’re wondering why you have a black eye - Lauren
Justin has passed out on the toilet in a locked stall. Stay tuned for pics.
I flushed a potato down the toilet so now we have to live in a hotel.
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