i woke up in his bed, he had my shirt on
and high school musical 3 was playing on his lap top
i'm only drinking out of pineapples from now on.
dude, she was giving me a lapdance and her thong had a skid mark. no I did not hit it.
If you're not peeing in public bi-monthly, you're not really living.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
SIMBAAAA REMEBER WHO YOU ARE
Showed up physical therapy hammered. The therapist just says this isnt part of the program.
Hey are you going to the pride parade? If so get me a shit ton of condoms
He made a toga out of my hot pink bed sheets and cracked an egg on his head. Then he proceeded to alphabetize our DVD collection, which was impressive because I'm 99% sure he couldn't have done that sober.
The house hit rave levels when La Bamba came on which confuses me because I live in white suburban Canada
PARA BAILAR LA BAMBA ASSHOLES
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Whatever you have to do, STALL THEM. Your toothbrush is in the kitchen, my pants are on the balcony, and I don't have eyebrows.
I had to google some of the kinky sex shit she was telling me she was into.
If that is not a reason to propose to her then I don't know what is
You're a hot mess, you know that?
At least I'm a FUN hot mess. Like a train crash full of pizza, fireworks and glitter.
You got naked in his car? Or the koala suit was in his car? One of those sounds a lot less slutty than the other......
This bitch goes out driving during the nor'easter to get her ass eaten.. that’s dedication
"You can have sex in my class, just stay quiet. I don't like noise." My professor... Shall make for an interesting semester.
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