at the topless march for equality..and wow.not all these boobs should be treated equally
No, I'm not keeping her! I can't become an adulterer and a dog stealer in the same 24 hours...
Crashed the mayor's bday party, no list for some reason. Wore suits. Ludacris was there.
No, its ok. Im playing strip pretty pretty princess im currently dueling for the crown
You crawled everywhere and rolled in ice cream. No more vodka for a month.
Smoked all day yesterday and even more today. Just survived high dinner with mom and sister. Thought I might eat the whole table
She used my 100 Ways To Cope With Stress handout to wipe puke off her face
I haven't included my nuts in a shave since the Shaq/kobe Lakers era. I gave my self the ol full court press in order to change the tempo.
You shouldn't play strip poker when you're having a wet fart kind of day.
Sitting naked in my bed eating leftover Mexican food drinking coors light.. Can it get any more single than this?
He offered me free drinks all night if I could beat him in a drinking race. I blacked out after that but just found his credit card in my bra so there's that.
Does it count as a threesome if your friend drunkenly has sex on top of you while you're passed out?
I'm about to do something based solely on the fact that a fortune cookie told me to. This may not end well.
He just told me my boobs made up for all the bad things that had ever happened to him. I'm definately having sex with him again.
He’s older
Like “has a job and pays his bills” older or “still watches porn on DVD because he can’t figure out the Internet” older?
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