his internet history is a lot of porn, how to make a hovercraft and side-effects of jacking off too much
dude if i could bring that prime piece of meat home, id be the luckiest average-looking girl who ever lived
Don't get the hula weed. It makes you sleep walk in destructive and confusing ways. I'll explain on Saturday.
Woke up on the kitchen floor cuddling with the dummy we made of you. Hope your internship is going well.
I could write a book on how to barely get by in community college. I just took an online quiz on my phone, at the bar, 6 minutes before it was due.
There's just something about sucking a flaccid dick that makes me feel so calm. Like a baby cow..
Speaking of roommates, Kelsey and I woke up to urine in our trash can. Neither one of us is willing to admit to it so we've come to the conclusion that someone snuck into our room in the middle of the night
She passed out on the kitchen table with two mickeys forties duct taped to her hands. Clearly she is going to fit perfectly in your house this semester
Just saw the german running around on campus. Thought of his small penis.
As you should.
This breakup hit defcon 5. Walked to pathmark with a denim jacket over my nightgown to get ben and jerrys. On sale btw.
How do I know if porn I have watched is haunted?
So is the trick to long distance communication to be drunk during phone conversations?
dollar rum and cokes, see you on the dark side of infinity
Totally reading about penis envy for my final exam
i let a mormon finger me. i don't ever want to be that drunk again.
Randomize
