Oh my god. I just envisioned myself eating panda meat. I need to get out of this class.
I'm pretty sure "Like A Prayer" will forever remind me of drunk nights & pants down around the ankles
Having sex with her was like reading the Wall Street Journal.
At the wedding. Seated next to the bar. No way this ends well
Don't remember much from last night, but I recall slipping you the tounge. For that I apologize
I had to throw up. it was the only way to avoid kissing her after she swallowed..
You could give me a blowjob later? :)
I meant do something romantic..
Blowjob In the moonlight?
He said i looked like a shooting star sprawled out on the floor while i puked and i kept blaming "senor cuervo" for doing me dirty.
Also I'm sitting home alone with a big ass bowl of marshmallows right now just eating. It's so sad.
I just want you and your enormous dick to be my fucking rebound so we can move on with our lives
There is a guy here calling himself the pants less weed fairy
I pretended to be blind and he pretended to be my assistant and long story short, we had to buy that bra and panty set, and now we're both banned from Victoria's Secret AND I have a cum stained demi cup.
reminiscing on last night: why the fuck did I feel the need to stand on chairs everytime we took a jello shot?
Either I'm getting old or the shit show is playing earlier than it used to...
Thanks for fucking the skin off my dick
It was a joint effort between my vagina my feet and your hand you can't just blame that all on me
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