i crushed up some extenze and put them in his protein powder - should make for an interesting gym experience
we just watched the ball drop on the spanish channel. best mistake of my life.
Btw sorry for throwing that bag of ice at your face lastnight....
Just for the record its a bit awkward when you introduced me to your friends at your house as your brother and then insisted in front of them that I sleep in your bed with you
I watched you fall asleep, sitting up, eating a cinnamon roll. You proceeded to wake up...smile at your cinnamon roll, ask it how it got into your hand and then began eating it again. You asked me if you were ridiculous last night, define ridiculous.
We need to drink more. Just think how awesome it would be to wake up in a trailer and NOT remember how wee got here.
How do you explain to a guy that he's like a little puppy dog that you play with, but then leave at the shelter to go home to your German Shepard?
I think I freaked him out last night. We got back to my place and I made chicken nuggets, chicken Alfredo, and half of one of those huge oreida hashbrown bags. And then ate all of it
I just fell off a roof. So I'm kinda chillin for a minute.
you seriously don't remember..? but then again, you were taking shots by yourself for like 30mins
What the fuck i just wanna eat my froot loops and sext in peace. Y'all motherfuckers gotta be loud as shit and break my concentration
No, no... It was great. I feel like my liver took a vodka shower and washed it's hair with pabst
Today, this cop risk his life to save me from a sink hole but all I could do is laugh, I was so stoned
Its because she suspects I'm a frequent drug user, which I am, but I am going to make her feel like she is crazy for believing it.
A guy I don't even know just ate me out on a washing machine at a random persons afterparty. I came as it was going through spin cycle.Just kept thinking "who does laundry during a party?"
Randomize
