since i spend so many of my nights sleeping on the bathroom floor i think im going to remove all toiletries from under my sink and replace them with a pillow and blanket.
dude ... she has a full length mirror in her shower, don't even tell me shes not dtf
Just saw some girl biking on campus with a babyseat on the front. Baby included. Do you know how many points that'd be worth?
Give me a few hours to remember what being sober feels like.
You know, there is no convenient place for your beer when you are on shrooms taking a shower.
No kidding. I just keep looking at that 'under 21 until 11/21/2011' on my id and whispering "soon enough"
He got me coffee AND filled up my gas tank. He must've fucked another girl in my car..
I legitimately thought I was gonna die getting finger banged to ja rule in the back of your car last night.
No like you've drunkenly persistently tried to take your shirt off in the middle of a park filled with children. You had already thrown your bra at my crotch.
Three Asian guys got on the elevator with a handle of Hennessey and a sleeping bag. This is not the start of a joke.
He still texted me and invited me over a day later so I guess I'm the lovable kind of psycho
Was i rolling around in a parking lot last night
He had to put his grandma's photo away before I tied him to the bed. She doesn't need to see any of that.
He flew in from NY last night. We had sex in the back of my car in the airport parking lot and then he fed me fresh Babka (from Breads Bakery) as I drove him home. I can't decide if I love him or Babka more.
Now all I have unanswered questions and a fucked up finger
Randomize
