I just woke up and realized I puked in my boxers WTF.
You stay classy.
The worst part was I forgot until I tried to put them on.
Its Shannon Doherty lazy not Forest Whittaker lazy
i would only ever fuck harry potter if he was on a broomstick.
So the weirdest part of it all was he whispered in my ear "can i eat you out on your tredmill?" I dont find him attractive at all anymore
Girl next to me in class just said to her friend "and I haven't even cried yet." Challenge accepted
what's the name of that soccar player i bit again?
Whoever invented the gimlet should be given a medal and then shot
What is the current exchange rate for ramen to jello shots?
I have never thoroughly inspected the geometry of my nipples until now. How do I fix this?
The Easter dress struggle is real
Yep. Just had to pull mine off to puke.
hitting rock bottom is getting taziki in your hair & simply putting it in a bun instead of actually dealing with it, just like your problems
Considering we're about to fuck, I really need your girlfriend to stop liking all my Facebook posts.
The laundromat is nothing like In the pornos
He drunk texted me what I think is two snails fucking on a mushroom. Is "you sick bastard" too mild a rejection?
ANIME MEN ARE MAKING ME QUESTION MY SEXUALITY AGAIN