Your tits are I can't wait for
Just saw a midget shotgun a coors light
Spotted: jayne dropping her cigarettes in a puddle...then picking them back up and putting them in her pocket. If i ever get that desperate, stop talking to me
It's just like soggy cereal, but cancerous
I just remembered before I gave him head I couldn't find a hair tie and he offered to hold my hair up. Maybe we were wrong.. Maybe he does have a heart.
we're at Rob's house and just invented the best drinking game ever....we are on Chatroulette and everytime we see a dick we all have to drink.
You got ahold of his prescription papers and gave out prescriptions for cranberry and vodka
i just entered cocaine into my calorie counter.
I wish I could go back in time 3 years and tell my freshman self how easy it is to hook up with freshmen
Anne I just took two ambiens. I think my body is melting into my blow up bed. Like a stick of butter just slowly melting. And I'm alright. Don't be afraid. I'll be alright.
Can we just talk about how I wrote out all the stuff I had to do this week and for Thursday it says "drink and cry"? ...I don't remember putting that but it sounds like something I would do
my mom said i came home and fell asleep on the floor. like right in front of her.
just passed my midterm while getting a blow job. i love going to school online
I'm sure if Robin Williams was still with us he would want you to see boobs.
New one isn't as good asmy ex. She won't put her tongue up my butt
Peter this is your "ex"
I stand by what i said
What you have to understand is that our lives aren't a disappointment so much as they crashed and burned with lethal doses of radiation and dog shit.
Randomize
