so explain again why im purple
no
dude I just sharted for the first time ever, kind of gross
well what did you think, shitting your pants would be fun
Hey I found a place that'll do a hand job for 42 bucks
im pretty sure one of the guys i was dancing with at graffiti wrote on my back "you rock". now feel like a danced with a 5 year old.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i'm almost done photoshopping my face on his wife. it's a done deal
So dude, she and I just got done having the most amazing sex, and then she rolled over and said that "lets make some tacos" and proceeded to the kitchen... naked... I'm buying the ring tomorrow
Even the French judge on the olympics would give that a 10
you were on ground yelling about how close the floor was to your face.
hungover at the ER to get half my contact removed from behind my eye. Not the start to the weekend I was hopin for
And I can say one thing, I look pretty good in high wasted pants. I don't know if that helps. But I do. God I'm high.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can I steal her, take her home, and feed her only vodka?
You know it's been awhile when the imagery of fucking AT A DENNY'S gets me really turned on.
We can put you in charge of something
I can be in charge of being more wasted than anyone there so everyone feels comfortable being ridiculous
If you find my purse on your yacht please call me - girl you slept with after yacht party
Okay I’ll say it... THIS MOVIE FUCKS
That’s probably the first time I've heard Little Women described that way and I love it
i had sex with a girl named after a fruit last night and it was the best thing to happen to me in 2020
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