I couldn't tell if he was hitting on me or if he was just mentally challenged.
after everytime she pucked, she insisted on us all giving her high fives
She gave 2 thumbs up when Nirvana came on the radio while blowing me in the bathroom
Hippo gnu deer
We're too lazy too send a pic of out balls. Just assume this is a pic of our balls and respond accordingly.
I don't know what you're talking about but its dick galore in the tub. We will be getting poked tonight. Bring forks.
I think I sprained my soul last night
I swear my vagina formed calluses just to deal with how big he is
I'm at work, and just realized I the beer smell I keep getting random whiffs of is my bra. I fail at life.
is there a reason blood came out of my hair in the shower?
head injury at diner. you headbutted the wall a few times because it got in your way
I met a pornstar at his bachelor party and signed his shirt giving him wedding advice
I'm pretty sure "good advice you would give to a freshman for achieving success" isn't constituted by introducing them to your addy dealer...
it is my civic duty to ensure the success of our youth.
For future reference, don't put tape on your nipples. Ouch.
I'll pick u up. I have to buy a new sofa cover anyway. I swear I've never seem a girl cum like that before.
Who put the toilet in the living room? This is extremely inconvenient right now.
Randomize