the night i cant remember will be the night i always remember thanks to my "i
I just walked in on my mom and dad......It wasn't my dad
Drunkenly auctioned off my bed for 3 tequila shots
Just had a thought: were the sirens on when we were in the ambulance?
can we get together and have a vodka water gun fight? i need to get som intense excersise/alcohol
All I remember from last night is petting the broom with my feet and feeling like I was standing on a horses head
They fucked on my pong table last St. Patty's and broke it. I feel like I should be hiding my new one. Would hate for a tradition to form.
Im invoking the "no judgements" clause of our friendship.
My god, what have you done?
I don't send those kind of pictures unless the recipient has already been up close and personal with it. I don't give previews, but I will provide recaps.
but seriously, if you see a redhead running down the street tonight in a carrot costume, call 911. He's tripping hard.
So my POF profile is full of Archer references. Only guys who get them will be getting any response to their messages.
well it was naive of you to actually think you're the only bday sex he had lined up for him today. I'm just suprised he actually had a line forming outside of his room
Lucky bitch I'm at work covered in Jeff pee. And my hair smells like beer because I was trying to prove a point about PBR serving multiple purposes.
Okay so my roommate deals some drugs so whenever he leaves we can hook up, be ready
I didn't know I was the on call booty call damn
It’s amazing such a big dick belongs to such a boring guy
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