i just bought a vibrator and the cashier says "have fun with that." i didnt realise what he said so i responded "you too." and then he gave me his number...
why doesnt he love me? i have tried everything. i even sang to him after sex.
you have got to be kidding?
oh my god. my mom just found my pipe. she thought it was a dildo.
like i said, there should be a sitcom about your family.
i've been fucking this guy since february and just found out he might be uncircumsized. currently google image searching to confirm.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I tried to put the left over margartia in a box for you but they wouldn't let me
I want to start this convo out by apologizing for the broken toaster.
Its kind of weird knowing that im only seeing you that day to fuck in some woods
I don't understand why your family and sex lives should EVER overlap.
You're tall, so I have high hopes for your dick.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The owner was showing me around and pointed at one of the bars and said "this is the one you're allowed to dance on. I could tell you wanted to ask." DREAM JOB.
You puked on yourself, then demanded to take shower. In which you kept saying "its raining"
You're talking to someone who was 80% serious about breaking into someone's house and leaving a cat there with our names in a heart tag on its collar
Cheyanne in woods. Ducks attacked. My toe is bleeding. We are gpsing our way home on foot. No worries
Did I penguin dive down a hill last night?
I'd invite you over to drink but then I wouldn't be drinking by myself.
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