I want to take you away to a place of dolphin rides and hot stone massages.
I think "bars open christmas minneapolis" is the saddest google search i've ever done.
his recent searches consisted of "World record for not bathing" and "Miley Cyrus vs Taylor Swift". Not even i am that desperate.
woke up this morning with a fat chick but she went downstairs and made pancakes without saying a word.
They just yellow carded someone for spilling a drink because it was a party foul. Love germans.
I just noticed my teeth are no longer straight. Wondering if anyone had an explanation.
booty call hours are between 1:30-3:00 AM thurs-sat with the exception of major drinking holidays and election days. please try again
seeing two hook-ups in tagged in the same picture will send chills down anyone's spine.
not much sitting here stoned eating my little sisters halloween candy and judging each individual hersheys candy bar and after much deliberation by the selection committee the original hersheys chocolate bar won
It's a little sad/awesome that I scored coke within 60 seconds of walking in the bar.
The student becomes the teacher.
Too bad pet owners lack respect for my training in ancient Buddhist and holistic rehab therapies.
I'm not sure the Buddhist consider pot brownies holistic rehab therapy
I deserve to have sex with a hot freshman ok
Oh my God it's like my cock was dipped in lava
Did you have a good sleep?
if a good sleep includes waking up cuddling a bottle of wine I had a GREAT sleep
You peed on a flamingo?!?
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