I was in a gas station that sold tazers and I just saw a billboard that said "Strippers, need we say more?" God I love Georgia!
there's unknown territories my dick was not made to discover
Just hooked up on shake weight girl's dad's porsche. What are YOU doing with your life?
the elusive kegmastree, who's mystery is only exceeded by it's power
they would be such cute babies and they would grow up to have huge dicks. and that would make me proud as a mother
Nm. Exausted and my teeth just fell out again
Not drinking has really freed up a lot of my time. I made a bracelet yesterday. I miss bars.
Woke up the day after the party with a bruise on my stomach. Pretty sure my liver was trying to escape for fear of it's life.
Bed, food, and you got really nice boobs. That's it really. Foundations of friendship right there.
He has a burner phone just to send dick pics. It's revolutionary
Just put on slippers before underwear so you know where my priorities are
wait you fucked a guy who wears k-swiss? seriously?
I know, im living my 7th grade dream
Apparently I was directing traffic outside of Keeneland. Apparently I'm not a police officer. Who knew....
You think that was bad? One time my parents found my sister half naked on top of the four runner in the garage. She makes me look like the good child.
If you think that liquor is the way to shower sex then you're right.
Randomize
