Literal conversation "you are ________ ____. you facebook friended me"
and you said cock pushups were impossible
I woke up this morning and was hoping we drank enough last night to have a unicorn drawn on my wrist. Good News: We did.
i'm all for saving the environment, but when we get into the shower to fuck, he shouldn't flip his shower hourglass timer
So J keeps drinking his last bit of drink, then spitting it out and drinks it again. Savor the flavor?
It's sad really how 5 am brings with it a distinction from drunken to pathetic.
So am I a slut for not remembering his name after sex last night or not recognizing him in the cafe today after he told me who he was?
your brother is wearing shin guards in the swimming pool. i have a feeling that this happens often
just got the results back. i love his dick even more now i know its clean
I guess the study abroad went badly, I gave him a joint and he just smoked it and cried all the way from the airport
So. I need to gloat. I couldn't exactly tell my family that I won this game by deep throating.
I think I'm still a little drunk from Sunday Funday and I just changed for a date in my car. wish me luck.
I'm at the nutcracker high as shit. It's so beautiful. I cried.
If you don't respond in the next 30min, I'm going to assume your in a sex coma, in jail, or dead... All of which I've become accustomed to, and will follow the appropriate channels of notification once you notify me.
I’m going to bedazzle that dick
What does that even mean
No idea, but I guarantee he’ll get hard every time he remembers it
Randomize
