I wonder what it would be like to masturbate in space
My BOSS just pulled out a box of Christmas stuff labeled reefs.
You know your from las vegas when the girl on the stage in the strip club was in my US gov class senior year
I just walked in on my roommate beating off with no pants on, an unbuttoned hawaiian shirt and a cowboy hat, and he weights 300 pounds
he/she has shaved legs and makeup on. but a spare tire stomach, high socks with high heels...a wig and glasses. and still talked like a man. it was a nightmare scenario
seriously though jaeger and i are fucking done professionally
He said my labia gave my vagina a "cute personality"
Just do let me go home with anyone especially I a guy with a hair sweater
i feel like i should invite him over so he can cockblock my roommate one last time before he graduates. for old times sake, ya know
Plus he stuck it in when you were sleeping which would have been the tipping point for me but you art school kids are all liberal and shit
MEG JUST LICKED A DRAIN PIPE. DAVE PUNCHED MATT IN THE THROAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN. I REPEAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN.
I just don't wanna be that girl with no ride and no pants
They found me wandering around campus screaming body shots over and over again wrapped in a curtain
This whole Rob and Chyna drama is giving me trust issues. I'm about to text my ex and be like if you haven't already deleted my nudes, can you?
Theres just something about today that says lets get drunk, dont you think?
Randomize
