Michael Jackson and Farah Fawcett are dead
NOOOOOOOO not MJ! Someone tell the paramedic to grab him by the heart and just "Beat it"
I didn't take her seriously until she snorted that ramen noodle flavor packet...
I remember convincing the limo driver to smoke with us and if he did I would name my first son after him.
OH MY GOD I CAN'T WAIT TO BONE YOUR EX BOYFRIEND. HOW AWKWARD IS THIS?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just tell your mom you have to go somewhere half naked with a strange man. She'll understand
no, you don't understand how much people deal here. All I had to say was "hey lets buy a bag" and he pulled over instantly, then the randoms in the car behind us pulled over and sold us a bag.
I just spent 5 minutes saying how beautiful you are and you come back with dont get fat cause you have weird nipples.
I slept with a Brazillian Man, That's why I'm Watching The World Cup
Ah, but I don't wear underwear. Every day is Commando Wednesday.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
like when you break up with someone your virginity slowly starts to grow back & when it's done it's like ding ding ding you're ready to date again
I knew it was love when he told me he wants to see me have multiple orgasms in one night
Hey remind me the get the pancakes out of my jacket
Probably going to live on vodka sodas and fireball shots
I was drunk, but not drunk enough to forget I had some dude on his knees begging for forgiveness.
I forget how to act sober
Randomize