The world would have a new energy source if someone would just take a blacklight to the backseat of that slut's car
Either allow it in a formal toast or i will drunkenly tell your in-laws while i'm dancing on their table. either way, the truth is coming out
Hes warming up week old McDonalds french fries, putting hot sauce on them, and counting them with his shirt off.
It was like having sex with a donkey. Everytime she got close she would kick me.
I don't know ur idea of a good first date but I'm pretty sure it shouldn't include him holding my hair while I puke in the street
She passed out in his mom's bed and when we went to go get her she went 'no its cool I live here'.
I was scared that I should know him but I was too busy blacking out to remember
So wait. Let me get this straight lol... you... are are considering offering fetish services to "trample and own" someone for $80 in order to pay for someone to come organize ur shit? Pure genius.
Let's play the game let's see how long Kayla can be sober
Can we just get drunk and watch the Birdcage please I have no tolerance for straight men today
I need to wash the frat house off of me
he's so sweet and its so cute. but I swear to fuck if I let my guard down and this was all a lie I am going to become a serial killer.
Interesting. All i can really say is humanoid shaped doritos bags melting very slowly
just because i'm not a monk anymore doesn't mean I need to tell you about my new sex life.
which is fantastic by the way.
I called him the wrong name all night, yet I still got a ride home from the party and hooked up with the guy. I'm irresistible.
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