He must be back home now. He moved his box of beer from her porch to ours.
Things we need. Powerade. Water in fridge. Mixers for vodka. And reality checks.
sooo... you have no idea who nailed their tubesocks to my wall?
The next time i black out make sure i remove the ping pong balls from my weave. Especially before my first day of classes.
It mathmatically balances. Less pants + more shirt = fully clothed. see? Not a whore!
Having boobs is probably the greatest thing in the world, free booze all around
There is a guy here calling himself the pants less weed fairy
I know you're very busy with sleep and things, but when you wake up we need to talk about weirdly shaped penises.
Sunday mornings are confusing. Like. I can't decide if I want to go for a run or start drinking
He was awful. Hubby's was apparently epic. I suck at swinging.
So I'm already mostly naked in a kind of bed but obviously too lazy to take my boots off. It's like January 1st is already here
I feel like the first time i have to use my accident insurance its going to be in some sex mishap with you.
Is it too far to say to someone "you're useless for everything besides sex"
Long fucking story. But hey I got an orgasm and breakfast so I'm winning.
Maybe I’ll just go to the party as myself
What, a homewrecker?
Touché
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