Dude, she knew her leg was on fire and she kept dancing. Bad-fucking-ass.
For some reason I just don't think you going to the gay bar alone on thanksgiving is a good idea.
Questioning the dried heart shaped nutella on my boobs. Valentines day has begun.
We eventually get in a cab (after david tried to hail multiple regular cars and some sort of shuttle bus)
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You did a strip tease for the toilet.
I shouldn't be home alone with this much peanut butter and the dog. I feel like i'm being recorded to see when my desperation will peak.
she kept asking for a lobster dinner while she was crying. it was actually the most reasonable drunk chick request i've ever heard.
Thats gotta be it. Also just found out that the fireworks will fit in the airsoft pistols...we are all gonna die
how many lesbians have to have their hearts broken before they realise I am not that kind of DJ
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We're already drunk. 4 hours to go still. And there's a bear advisory. TOP WEEKEND.
How do I go about messaging a girl on a dating site whose little sister I've had a three some with...?
this night just went from meh to biblical thanks to drunk naked yahtzee
we told you you couldn't get your dick sucked because you were a girl and you yelled at us and said we were 'discriminating you'
A person can only vomit Fireball so much before they quit it forever
So I wore my ankle step-counter exercise thingy while I rode him. Don't fuck him- I only burned .2 pounds.
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