from all the glitter we used it actually looked like a disco stick
is it really high of me to have brought my own hot sauce to wendys?
gettin drunk isnt as much fun when i can use my own id for it
I was handcuffed to a girl for half-an-hour. And I'm still the only one in the house who didn't get laid.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just woke up to a text from him apologizing for making me eat a full lemon
THERE IS THE SEXIEST BEARDED MAN HERE. I CAME EVERYWHERE.
At one point you starting double fisting oreos in your mouth confused about how you got out of the car
Yeah well my vagina has expectations too but they don't get met all the time.
Its official. I've reentered slutty territory. I was a condom away from having sex in a childs playhouse at a park. Oh and I lost my car keys.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I sincerely hope you find your fuck buddy and have a wonderful night of champagne and whores
Is it possible to break your brain with drugs?
Just taxi'd to the airport holding a zip lock bag of my own vomit. Bachelorette success.
i forgot how loud opening a beer is in a house where your not allowed to drink
I got a gay guy to motorboat me. These tits could change the world, I'm telling you.
I am no longer and illegal Moonshiner. I just made thousands of gallons of incredibly High test alcohol with police watching and waiting for thare couple of jugs so that they can bring home and disinfect their houses with it. I'm fat with money at the moment.
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