people will do anything to get on MTV. like get pregnant.
New drinking game watching teenage mutant ninja turtles movie and drinking every time raphael says damn, someone says april or ms oneil, and shredder appears And every time we see a mustache
And as you crawled into the bathroom last night you repeatedly said "I know the routine".
Haha so I huess that means he's a little over 7. I can use my throat as a ruler!!
One less school supply you need to buy!!
I made a Russian puke. I outdrank a Russian. I am unstoppable.
I world jack off literally anyone now that I'm not related to.
I like to think of you as more a magic eight ball of my life's journey?
I love THIS fish, the rest of the ocean can go fuck itself. I am ahab and he is my whale
Naw. I'm tired and I'd have to shave my legs. I doubt the sex or the company would be worth it.
Please tell me how the stripper got back to Sarah's from the trailer park
I just smoked a joint and ate a sandwich while watching someone get arrested. Bonnaroo is a silly place.
If you recall, I made a Zoolander reference almost immediately after you pulled out of me the first time we had sex.
I mean, we were all drinking, but I'm pretty sure kidnapping came up.
I think my pickup truck has been used for the sex... This doesn't sit right with me.
Come over here. Bongs and porn. I found the promised land
Randomize
