dude i woke up laying next to some guy. i dont have my bra or his name. he has a nice tv though.
therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
I ate a lot of your sunchips. I mean a lot. Like 4 to 5 bags.
I love you and want you to know that you're the best friend ever and me lassoing you with a seatbelt was out of sheer affection.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Bouncy castle Catalina wine-mixer race for the cure. It will be as fun as it sounds
He set an alarm on my phone to an infant screaming and puking to make sure i take my pill. its working.
we were playing waterfall, then strip waterfall, then we were just listening to music, drinking, and slowly becoming more naked
The low-flow toilet at my office cannot handle the intensity of this hangover.
I feel like on the last day of finals we should run around campus dressed like Moses screaming "LET MY PEOPLE GO!!!!"
I'll start the recruiting
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's the 30 sec rule.... the worst that could happen is I could die
I don't want to get pregnant doggy style. That's sad.
How high were you when you left that message, cause you made honest-to-God, credible seal noises.
Moral of the story - don't craft naked. Your nipples with thank me.
I WANNA SUCK HIS DICK ON A BOAT
She is still drunk from the night before, sitting here eating KFC mashed potatoes and drinking Arbor Mist before Anatomy lab.
Randomize