quit re-tweeting John McCain's tweets
I've been thinking and really it's a miracle I haven't had an STD yet.
For the whole 7 seconds I lasted, I was in heaven.
You took a fire extinguisher off the wall in the hallway to play Ghostbusters.
Just realized the guy is in my class. Unless there's another guy that had half his ear bit off at a St. Patty's party
He told me to put on my big boy pants, then take them off and fuck her before he smacks me with a chair. His pep talks suck.
I'm just going to say , cocktail races are not for a Wednesday night maybe not even a Friday type of deal
I'm hungry
Come here to eat and play. It'll be like Dave and Busters except with sex
I'm looking for mother nature. And when I find her, I'm looking her right in the eyes and telling her to fuck off.
Seriously. What did you do to me. You have a monstercoooooock.
I can't believe I just typed monstercoooooock. Twice.
My car windows are covered in lube. Happy 4th of July!
I traded him cumming in my face for a year for a Disney annual pass. One giant leap back for feminism, one small step for the adult child Disney fan.
It was just a matte of pubes and mustard.
She asked how comfortable I was with her while we were in the shower. She then proceeded to pee in said shower.
Wow i just puked in front of the lady that was drug testing me. I passed though!
Randomize
