What do you call a girl with PMS and GPS?
A crazy bitch that WILL find your ass!
It was so delicious I was introducing it to people. Guy from my psych class was like "This is my girlfriend, Erica," and I was like, "This is my milkshake, Oreo."
he just started chanting dark meat! dark meat! out of no where.
What I wanna know is who took a picture eiffel towering her?
Apparently she held up my head the entire 40 minutes, convincing the cab driver that I was okay
She's locked herself in the bathroom with a tub of icecream and she's watching my little pony on her phone. We know it cause she sings with them.
Pregnancy scare over. Let the cockfest begin.
I'm at work, and just realized I the beer smell I keep getting random whiffs of is my bra. I fail at life.
Can I steal her, take her home, and feed her only vodka?
Fyi your toilet is not contaminated. We'd have to scissor pretty hard to pass what I got.
I can still be you friend and be there for you. And sometimes get drunk and fuck you.
His parents then knew me as the blackout who took care of him and stole his watch
Ignore him I am the one that wears the pants in the relationship while "the big man" cries in bed
It's like his penis moved in and did some interior decorating without telling me first...
Ok, as his sister I didn't tell you this but he's very familiar with pregnancy symptoms. So next time he calls you fat freak him the hell out by asking if your ankles look swollen.
Randomize
