i found out what alaskan girls practice during those six months of darkness
areolas are like halos for boobs.
I apologize for forcing you to look at my boob when we were high. It was uncalled for
I think he just gave me the 'I used to sleep with your sister' discount
I five year old is judging me because I just opened a bottle of Sam Adams with my teeth before 8am
she gave me head while wearing a sombrero and told me it was her "welcome to south of the border" blowjob. i am never leaving mexico.
There is a girl in my drunk limo who hasn't seen an uncircumcised penis. Hook me up with a picture.
Okay now that I've been wanting to eat these hot cheetos in the bathroom, I know it's time I need to stop smoking and go to sleep.
I imagine I kinda look like a banana with one boob out.
I found your doppelganger. same hair, eyes, personality, catch phrases, and penis. it was mind-boggeling.
I was so ripped I had a natty light box over my head carrying a spray bottle out in the streets trying to give car washes.
I'm not letting you use my bathroom unsupervised anymore. You peed in the sink thinking it was a urinal...
Is this like a preordered booty call?
I just remembered that before we left my house I vowed to stay fully clothed and I FAILED
And when were you going to tell me to stop dancing on his coffee table singing "come on irene?"
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