12 garbage cans filled with water, a beer can floating in every garbage can, 20 ft. apart and you shoot with dodge balls..and thats only how the night began
im not gonna bother asking u how it was... we could hear u through the walls
What do I have to do to get you laid? I talked to that girl with the ugly dog for 45 minutes trying to get you in, and all you said was "Steven Spielberg is my favorite director."
I have a music final in an hour so I put all the classical songs we need to know in a shower power hour playlist, beer included.
i looked at my phone and realized all i had said to her the entire night was misspelled variations of "NOTHING IS THE SAME" over and over. she eventually stopped replying.
You do resemble something that has been used as a chew toy.
I just found a wine bottle in my shower. Must have been a good night.
We're having chugging races with long island ice tea, I won. To often
I should make a collage of all the pictures of me caught doing slutty things
she doesn't even know what year it is. She just stumbles around life with a bottle of rum
of fours songebofy did dknt stop believing
how legible are my texts
Found a pic on my phone from last night. You're drunk. Arm wrestling some guy. In the bar bathroom. At a baby changing station. It's my new wallpaper.
After passing out at the kitchen table, you woke up in my parents bed in between them. With no pants on.
That same damn squirrel keeps staring at me like I did something wrong. Nature knows when you're hung over.
so idk what that means but now because of me he has a police file as breaking into my apartment and sleeping in my hallway under the carpet
Randomize
