I can't watch pbs sober anymore
What ever happened to making out with a few boob grabs here and there?
I can tell how much and what I drank by my morning shits
I am so horny I keep driving over the rumble strips... best half hour ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I left a bag of circus animal cookies in my car all day. they melted together into on giant cookie. this could either be the best or worst thing ever
How does, "Im sorry I was such an intoxicated bitch, I didn't mean anything I said" sound as an apology.
My balls had bee stings let's just leave it at that.
Try not to bring up the fact that I woke up and couldn't find my pants... He might get the wrong idea.
if u cant get laid at this wedding we need to have a looooooong talk about the possibility of u becoming a lesbian
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like I need to get a restraining order against him but I'd probably be the one to break it.
Drinking, I should not. Got here I don't know. Still drunk, I am. At courtneys.
i want to shrink myself down to penis size, climb inside of her pussy and just live there for a few months.
At one point I was counting his nipple hairs to calm myself down.
I'll pick u up. I have to buy a new sofa cover anyway. I swear I've never seem a girl cum like that before.
If I'm getting through this pandemic I'm doing it drunk.
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