You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
Just tried to tap morse code on the wall seperating our beds to tell you I was awake and ready to smoke
Dude its so hot it my room I can't jack off. Its gonna be a long summer.
I now beleive the Trojan Ecstasy ad "feels like nothing's there". They forgot to add "...cause the condom broke."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
After what u did to that bathroom I think the $30 and the "sorry I'm a jackass" note was the thing to do.
We talked about all of the sex positions that would better allow him to feed me grapes. I think I'm in love.
Ever have those mornings where you just can't wait to puke in the shower?
He told me i had to sleep under his bed. He said it would be my castle.
You never know, some chick could have a weird unibrow fetish.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is it socially acceptable to be blind drunk at half five on a Monday afternoon?
Which pub are you in?
I just need to stick to one night stands and delete social media
The cup holder in my recliner holds a whole bottle of wine. That's definitely a sign.
It's a herpes check up not a beauty pageant
i was really depressed when i left the health dept this morning after i had to write a higher number next to "partners" than "age"
Remind me to tell you: When threeways go awry, my MLK weekend story.
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