He came through my line today and bought designer impostor perfume, just for men gel, and astroglide. I almost DIED.
you threw up in someones recycling bin and left a note apologizing. how drunk do you think you were?!
dude, i was at the student union last night trying to study but some retarded sorority spent an hour voting on the color of the seasons shirts like it was a UN meeting- someone motioned purple, someone objected, and half an hour later after 2 recounts they decided on purple
she was puking into the toilet drowning herself saying "its okay im a swimmer"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Came to from my blackout with native american warrior facepaint on I'm too old for this shit
The facepaint not the blacking out
There are at least 3.6 billion human cocks in this world. Get some. Get as many as humanly possible. Literally. Do it. 1-2-3 go!
He's worked out some sort of arangment where all three of them are dating each other and they've all moved into an apt. with two king beds pushed together
A true beacon of hope in these dark times
Witnessing a crazy lady on the bus screaming about how romney is one of the four horsemen of the apocalypse.
The last thing I remember from that party was me shouting "hold my feet I'm going in strapped like Rambo"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Please don't think I'm weird for texting you this at 12:08 am but I just found another picture on the Internet where I think you can see his dick through whatever he's wearing
As a home can we vote to stab Peter?
My ex unfollowed me on SPOTIFY bruh. Freaking spotify. The butthurt is real
Angels sing when his face is between my thighs. I came 3 times before he even came up for air.
before i went to bed i wrote myself a note that says 'i feel all swirly'
It’s only loud for those who wanna get loud. The bowlers are protected.
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