It really wasn't that bad. Well, it was pretty bad, but only in 3 second bursts.
Omg. There's def a kid, like 10 years old, sitting in a buggy at wal mart holding a sign that reads "I can't behave"
I know it may not be fiscally responsible to pregame fifty cent night, but I'm gonna go ahead and do it anyway.
CAUTION: TWINS DO NOT HAVE TWIN PENISES.
I woke up tied to the door handle with reindeer patterned socks. You can tell it's Christmas.
I am not kidding you. There is an airport luggage cart overturned in my driveway. We need to stop going to the airport bar.
They got their marriage license when they were at the courthouse for her arraignment.
You better fuck one or both of those bitches and bring me pictures that will make me uncomfortable
I can do at least one of those things.
Dad says your scarf isnt fooling anyone and u look like a douchebag, its literally the perfect time to tell him your gay
WHY IS IT FROWNED UPON THE DRESS UP IN CAT COSTUMES AND SIT OUTSIDE OF BARS WITH A BOX OF WINE I THOUGHT THIS WAS AMERICA
So I'm sitting here baked on a bridge thinking about how plants think, I miss you so much
Dude it's 6 am and you just invited me to a hotel with a shit ton of coke. Best morning ever
Well I typed "penicillin a" into the search engine and before I could finish "penicillin and drinking" popped up. Google knows me too well.
I don't see why I have to pay for it.
your head went through the window, you're pretty much obligated to pay for it.
Is it wrong for me to wish my cat had arms to get me a beer?
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