...i had to draw her a diagram of her own vagina. including a little arrow to the clitoris. shouldn't it be the other way around?!?
Just mixed Baileys and yoohoo. I feel like an alchoholic 2nd grader.
I knew the cheap date at Taco Bell would backfire because it makes even the most pre-cautious girls involuntary fart in public
No. I remember how loud you used to get. Trust me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Nothing ruins a good sext like too many emoticons
There is a homeless man handing out free beer on the city bus. He has a cooler and everything. I love this trashy yet generous city.
He tells me he loves me and I say I just want him for sex, then he looks at me like I just said I hate puppies. What kind of guy is he?
All i remember is you yelling at a stop sign and the rest is a blur
I drank, I fought, I made my ancestors proud.
And then someone hit me with a pool cue
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he came during what was supposed to be the foreplay blowjob. there goes my evening.
He wore the same cologne as my orthodontist so all I could think about was how I hadn't worn my retainer in months
We drank vodka and koolaid through a traffic cone. It got rowdy.
You probably shouldn't do that...but if you do take pictures
Walk of shame through Chipotle? Check.
All I know is I woke up in the back seat of my car, with the engine on, and my gps navigated to florida.
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