yes because when i jack off the first person i think about is christina applegate
just added God to my list of friends who can only see my limited profile on facebook. its such a relief to know that He can't watch me fuck up my life anymore.
This dude was wearing a "Plan B- One Step" backpack. I wonder how many more I have to buy until I get mine??
He spent 6 hours at the ER after crashing a motorcycle and still came to the bar, Ofcourse I went home with him. He's my hero.
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Are you alive?
I googled "I don't want to vomit anymore," and "how to rip out your uvula," at 9 am this morning, but I'm still here. Uvula and all.
Finished watching the entire first season of mighty morphing power rangers. Now I have nothing. Not even a life.
That was the apt with beer in the juice and the floor caving in. Don't go.
Sometimes crazy just comes naturally. I don't need booze to say that on occasion I feel the need to rip off my asshole and throw it against the fridge to see if it sticks.
It's was about average. But he had a tat on his thigh that said "pull-out n' rollout" so I won't have to worry about a round two request.
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just won 200$ from the school for "liking" the anti-alcohol seminar. putting it to good use
how?
not even kidding, my fake id is arriving in 6-8 business days
No no no he wouldn't talk to me before I showed his best friend how good I am at twerking
My dad just said "fuck circus"
A check for $9 that I used to buy six boxes of Girl Scout cookies bounced. I think I've hit a new low.
He seems like a nice guy. I mean, I know he's married and he's essentially paying me to be his side hoe, but he really seems like a good person.
Well. I think my red tank top is jinxed. this is now the second time it's gotten jizz on it.
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